I don’t think anyone would disagree that the past two weeks have been challenging here in the U.S., especially if you hoped for a different outcome. Look, I get it. Nearly 77,000,000 people are happy with how things turned out, but, for the rest of us, it has been devastating and painful. Who you voted for aside, our country is divided, we’re fighting with each other, and relationships are being torn apart. Things just feel heavy, stressful, and sad.
Thinking about the sadness the country inspired today’s post, but I’m not just talking about post-election sadness, I am talking about sadness in general and the times when we’re in the middle of it and still have to pull it together and keep going because sometimes we just don’t have a choice. We have to get up and go to work, attend that important meeting, hit a presentation out of the park, or nail that interview. So while this post can apply if you are grappling with the feelings you are working through post-election, sadness is a feeling that transcends election cycles. We’ve all been there when things are in turmoil and you need to keep it together on the outside.
SELF-CARE WORK LOOKS: OUTFITS FOR THE WORKPLACE WHEN YOU ARE GOING THROUGH A HARD TIME
I have put together four different work looks that will help you with self-care during times of sadness. None of this may take away whatever you’re dealing with but may help you pull it together when you need to.
OUTFIT #1: PROFESSIONAL COZY
Nobody blames anyone for wanting to wear the comfiest, coziest clothing when they feel sad and depressed. When you have to go to work, you can just wrap yourself in a blanket and shut the world out. In this look, I am giving you something that might suffice. I used this comfy cardigan that asks nothing from you, M.M. Lafleur’s ultrasoft relaxed yak and alpaca wrinkle-free cozy cardigan. Despite its comfort, it’s designed for the workplace. I styled this cardigan with Athleta’s tapered Endless pants that are made in performance fabric and what a client described as pants she could wear to do Pilates, and a merino turtleneck from Eileen Fisher in their gorgeous redwood shade. I finished the look with beige crisscross strap flats and colorful hoops from Lele Sadoughi.
OUTFIT #2: WHEN YOU CAN’T MUSTER A SUIT BUT HAVE NO CHOICE
The thing about jobs is you don’t have a choice in terms of what you can and can’t wear. Yes, workplaces have gotten much looser about what that looks like but sometimes you don’t get to do it your way and it’s just the way it is. It’s all about finding workarounds. This suit from M.M. Lafleur, for example, is basically the most unsuit-suit you can wear. First, it’s made in a lightweight, stretchy fabric, machine washable, travel and packing-friendly. The blazer has zippered pockets and the pants have a comfortable elastic waist and wear like joggers but look professional. The sweater is from Ministry of Supply, a company that focuses on the same type of innovative fabrics as the M.M. Lafleur suit. Designed to be a cotton-cashmere alternative, it is moisture-wicking, odor-resistant, pill and abrasion-resistant, and has underarm ventilation. The suit isn’t just comfortable, it can all be thrown in the machine. I finished the look with a silver pair of Cole Haan oxfords and a pair of silver linear earrings from Lucy Quartermaine.
OUTFIT #3: BRIGHTEN YOUR OWN DAY
When life has knocked you down, sometimes the only thing you can do is surround yourself with things that bring you joy and happiness and one of the best ways to do that is through your clothing. Bright colors can release dopamine and any color we’re drawn to can balance the autonomic nervous system. I researched it here. It may not make everything better or go away but when you’re down, wearing things that make you happy can not only improve your mood but also give you a sense of control.
I styled this cute hot pink French bulldog sweater from Boden over a green polka dot button-up shirt, also from Boden, and black pants from Vince. I finished the look with bright pink oxfords from Miz Mooz and green hoops from Machete.
OUTFIT #4: SUIT UP IN YOUR ARMOR
Being sad isn’t just covering your head under your blankets and waiting for the storm to pass, it’s about suiting up and putting on what feels like your personal armor. You imagine yourself like that Angela Bassett meme as she walks away from the car as it blows up, and when you put that outfit on, you feel like you can take on the world. There is no right outfit, the right outfit is whatever makes you feel strong and in the face of these hard times, its power cannot be underestimated. There is a time for being a cuddle puddle with your softest, coziest clothing and other times for being a badass.
For this badass look, I styled this sharp, strong black double-breasted blazer from Argent with a pair of bootcut jeans from Hudson, my favorite shaped shirt from BOSS Hugo Boss, a two-tone link necklace from Jane Win, beige pumps from M.Gemi and a tan belt, also from M.Gemi.
CLOTHING WON’T MAKE IT BETTER BUT IT WILL HELP
I don’t want to make light of how anyone feels now or whenever they are in the middle of dark times. I don’t think anyone expects clothing will fix what is hard to deal with, but when times are hard, the small things matter; what we do, who we surround ourselves with, how we care for ourselves, and even what we wear.
THANK YOU for this topic. Yes, it’s been a difficult few weeks…and I believe we’ll have more, especially after January 20. This type of dressing is just what I need to help take care of myself. Spot on.
Thank you, Heidi. We’re all navigating the best we can and the little things help. We’re all learning a lot about boundaries and self-care right now. Take care of yourself! xo
Heading into my closet now to find clothing that looks like a warm hug but works like an outfit.
It’s nice to know that we can do both, right? You hang in there!
should have said, ‘looks like an outfit but works like a warm hug’.
I don’t work ay more but I do know that when you’re feeling low and vulnerable wearing something you love, particularly in a colour you love is a tiny piece of armour. A good book helps too- though perhaps not at work!
I agree and so many people I’ve spoken with have turned to things just like that to get through. When we can’t control an outcome, controlling our immediate surroundings does make a difference!
These are all much better options than the all black ensembles I’ve been wearing for two weeks….
I would imagine so, although I do understand the inclination!
This post is so helpful in a rough time, first for expressing the grief and fear many of us feel. And for giving ideas how to be cozy and presentable when morale low. Thank you.
I am glad this has helped you. I wanted to show the progression because, I think, while it’s not necessarily linear, we don’t always feel like mashed potatoes either. I remember catching myself singing, “Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start over again,” one morning.
Bridget that was a kindness to speak about the sorrow many feel. And as a Professional, the outfits are perfect. They are comfortable and suitable. the whole post was fieeled with your kindness.
I appreciate it, Ellen, and as much as I want to say it was entirely out of generosity, it was also for selfish reasons too. We’re all holding tight together right now.
Things don’t always go the way we want. However, as for me, I refuse to be depressed or anxious about the state of the union or with any challenge in life.. Yes, it’s sad that there is such division but being depressed is only hurting yourself and will not change anything. When I have been faced with a challenge in life, (I am the sole caregiver for my much older husband) I turn to meditation, prayer, good nutrition and exercise to help me get through. I remember that I am doing the best that I can for this person that I love. I also try, when my schedule permits, to help others. At the end of the day, I know that I brought help (possibly joy) to another person. That makes me HAPPY!
I think it’s great that you have found a way to handle difficult times and that you are in a really good place. I have learned that everyone processes things on their own timeline and that I need to give grace to that. Everyone deserves their own pace even if I don’t understand it.
Oh, I forgot! jThe outfits are right up my alley!